We all know when things aren’t going so well, but it can be hard to get to the nitty gritty of what’s wrong, especially if communication between you and your partner has broken down completely. Relationship experts actually believe that just four factors are responsible for most breakups.
Criticism
Even when someone says that they take criticism well they’re probably lying because nobody likes being told they’re doing something wrong. This pathological fear of failure, be it personal, professional or emotional comes from when we were children and being told off for misbehaving or doing the ‘wrong thing’ led making us feel sad, lonely and confused, especially if we witnessed a sibling being praised for what we saw as similar behavior. When we tell someone, we don’t like their dress sense or would prefer they didn’t cook you’re telling them that their personality is a problem that needs solving. Constant criticism can then lead to someone feeling like they’re never good enough or that they're dating their mom or dad!
Getting Defensive
Obviously, if someone points out a flaw in our character we aren’t going to thank them for it! When it comes to confrontation people are either rhino’s, they’ll go out and meet it head on, lash out if they feel like they’re being attacked and try to twist the blame onto someone else. Or they’re hedgehogs; they’ll curl up in a ball, try to pretend everything’s fine, but become sarcastic, cold and spiky when you try to talk to them about what’s wrong. It’s far easier to pick a fight, give someone the cold shoulder or refuse to deal with the issue than sit down and ask someone honestly how they feel about their actions.
There’s nothing worse than being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t respect you, your values or beliefs. When contempt, be it through verbal or physical actions is shown it implies that the other person believes they are superior. Trading insults aren't funny, banter or ok because they know you’re only joking as quite often one person in the relationship will be more sensitive than the other. Psychologically, if you’re with someone who thinks they’re better than you, you’re no longer on the same level, which means resentment, anger and confusion start to creep in. One of the easiest ways to predict if the relationship will last is to call psychic hotlines. Alternatively, look at how you treat one another. Are you friends? Do you actually like spending time together?
Pixels Courtesy Of: Trinity Kubassek
Stonewalling
Relationships are built on trust, love, and communication, so once you stop talking to each other, you may as well pack your bags now. Refusing to talk, shutting down when things get difficult or acting like a child when they’ve made a mistake is a sure fire way to kill even the most loving relationship, or marriage stone dead. If your partner isn’t even giving you the courtesy of a response, then you should take some time apart to decide if you can see a future with this person or if you’d actually be better off alone.
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